I have never been floored by an election manifesto but the one announced by Pm Najib to a stadium full of bused in busloads of cheer leaders was altogether out of this world!
Thirty two pages long!
Full of specific pledges and promises.
Among which, 1.3 trillion ringgit worth of investment over 5 years, creating 3.3 million jobs!
One million affordable homes (indirect admission there are still many poor Malaysians after 56 years of Barisan's benevolent and very capable rule, no?)
More klinik 1Malaysia outlets.
BR1M assistance more than doubled from 500 ringgit to 1200 ringgit.
My, my, my hands are hurting from too much clapping!
But I have read that klinik 1Malaysia outlets are often not manned by qualified doctors but only by assistant medical officers who are really not doctors but hospital assistants.
And I am not too certain whether in all the 56 years of Barisan's rule, they had built one million affordable homes.
Now, to build one million affordable homes in five years is truly amazing and praise worthy by any standard!
However, I won't doubt that under Barisan's capable hands, attracting 1.3 trillion ringgit of investments in five years should not be difficult to achieve.
We don't have to go so far. No need to go attract investments.
Just create and farm out projects to friends, families, cronies and two dollar companies that we are so good at doing, and the pledge should be easily taken care of.
I do not know whether what I have read about klinik 1Malaysia outlets is true or not.
I really don't care.
Compared to Barisan's 32 page thick tomb of pledges and promises, the opposition's manifesto looks so thin, pale and anaemic.
So, of course, I will go for the revised and improved BR1M.
I only have one request of Pm Najib.
Please be a bit more generous.
Increase the annual BR1M assistance a little more to 88,888.00 ringgit (a nice and lucky figure, don't you think?)
Then I truly can take it easy, shake my legs and don't have to slave anymore!
Of course, if you do that, Sir, I promise to give you two votes.
One, as a legitimate voter.
The other as a phantom, if you like.
Jom Ubah (Come, Let's Vote For Change!)
Check out this beautiful Kadazan language version of the song here